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On Better Social Networking

I have been trying in vain to find social networking sites, that are not full of trolls, federal agents with fake profiles, and bullies,
I have been trying in vain to find social networking sites, that are not full of trolls, federal agents with fake profiles, and bullies, of which FxxLife is one of the most notorious (on FxxLife beware of profiles with the question mark "?" avatar. these will usually also be new and not show much activity). This is not only my opinion; a great deal of the membership are very dissatisfied and have similar complaints. I will be very greatful if you can suggest some social networking sites, 'not' hosted in 'auscanzukus' countries, with the following foci: sex and gender, dating, BDSM, technology, computers, DIY, etc. I am especially looking for sites that don't 'bust-my-opsec' by default; as pretty much all of them do, including 'so called' secure email services. They do this by requiring two factor verification, either by SMS, recovery email or credit card info. I'm no longer primarily focused on transport layer security; it's the knuckleheads at the sites you visit that sell you out. Without this 5th column, there might actually be some privacy of thought on the Internet.

The way most social networking sites are designed, you have a permanent feed, of all your activity, that's available for anyone to view, all the time; then, your feed is broadcast to your friends list. Hey, I like having friends and sharing 'some' of my thoughts with them, just not 'all' of them. Also, having anyone who visits my profile being able to see 'all' of my activity, is just beyond the pale, imho. With this arrangement, anyone can see thoughts or research I intended only for myself or for a specific group of people. This basically forces me to stay off the forums and strictly use pm'ing for any serious questions or discussions. This has been extremely frustrating and imo defeats the 'stated' purpose of the site. It's also more than difficult to find real profiles and truely like minded people. In addition to having sites hosted in countries that respect user privacy, at least on paper, I'd like to suggest some structural modifications to the way social networking sites are usually organized.

First, I think user profiles should be organized according to interests and that users should be able to filter who is able to contact them based on these and other 'optional' criteria such as language, geographical location, age, gender, personality type, etc. For example, if I only want to be contacted by empathetic neurotypical gay systems engineers, who live in Afganistan, I should be able to select for this. Also, I think that individual users, should be able to have one or more 'private' forums and chat rooms, that they create themselves, where each individual user acts as her or her own moderator and can remove posts or ban anyone he wants immediately, from his or her 'own' forums and chat rooms, like everyone else will be able to do, within this system. That way the individual user is empowered to filter out the trolls, bullies and any other disruptive or undesireable influences, as he sees fit. Users should also be able to vet potential friends on their own. In other words individual users should be able to offer each other various forms of identity 'tokens,' that will at least offer a reasonable likelyhood that potential friends are presenting themselves accurately and are not just creating fake profiles, for infiltration, running a con, or for some other malicious purpose. PM'ing could be organized as not only bidirectional, but also as a conference call, where all the users in the pm could agree to invite or allow another party to join their private discussion, or agree to exclude a user for the duration of that pm session. Perfect forward secrecy techniques can also be employed, as well as invitation, referral and request methods of introduction. Users should also be able to create potential friend "waiting rooms," where potential new friends may wait while a "trust analysis" can be carried out on them. This should at least deter those bad-apples, looking for a quick payoff and "not" willing to invest the time a "mutually" beneficial relationship 'may' reasonably require. This way the membership is much less dependent on the oversight of a certainly, er.. I mean potentially, compromised support staff; and can manage their own affairs on a day to day basis. As a final thought, enterprising users could also create their own sites, with their own rules, and allow other users, who also have their own sites, to connect to them, creating a truely decentralized social network (I think they would need the same software platform, which would probably include a built-in server). "I can definitely use some suggestions about which software platforms might be able to handle this." I'm currently only familiar with Boonex Dolphin; and I don't think it's got the chutzpah or muscle for this.